Abortions

One thing about my line of work... we designers have a sense of
parenthood/ownership over our designs... when we come up with something
we know will be really good... even if its on paper... we treat it like
our child. The problem is... not all good/brilliant work is
commercially viable... and at the end of the day, we have to help our
clients make money/finish the project. So... I'm wondering, how many
brilliant ideas/drawn buildings have not been carried out into
reality... how many architects/designers have looked at the drawings on
their boards/computer screens and winced in pain at the fact that they
know these things wont be built anyway? I know my dad has cried
silently over quite a few...



Well, I'm no master architect... but I'm starting to know how it feels...



I can't wait for the day that something I've designed actually gets topped off on site.



In the mean time, I'll be crying over my stillborn children... soldier on... and make new ones... hehehehe buildings I mean... not real kids.

Flying Solo

Although I've found a sense of peace in God and my family... there are
times when I can't help but look for someone to share the little
victories and defeats that I go through on a daily basis. You know how
artists have to have a muse/inspiration? I kinda feel that too.



Oh well...



nasaan ka man

mahahanap din kita

pansamantala

ako'y susugod ng mag-isa



at pag dumating na ang oras

na tayo'y magtagpo't

magkita, at ako'y

naihanda na ng panahon

at sinadya ng Diyos at tadhana



alam kong mas malayo

ang aking mararating at

di hamak na mas matayog

ang ating maitatahak

na landas.



hindi bale,

bukas, itong lungkot

na ito'y aalpas.





wow... was that a feeble attempt at poetry?

Random shots

Management guru Peter Drucker passed away last November 11, 2005.
Businessweek ran a very insightful article about his life and his
ideas... you got to hand it to him... for someone who did it based on
feel and the seat of his pants... he sure showed tons of
scholars/bookies like me that oftentimes... its pattern recognition and
intuition that gives you the edge. You also have to credit him with
being one of the first to pinpoint corporate social responsibility and
good governance as important pillars of a company's strength. My dad
introduced me to his books, and they have truly made a difference in
how I handle my career and serve in my job. I recommend his stuff...
especially to technical guys like me who weren't immersed in a
business/marketing environment in college... his stuff is sure to get
you up to speed in the corporate world.



Yesterday, 2 - F16 fighter jets landed in NAIA, one of them apparently
had problems with its control/avionics system... being one of the most
maneuverable attack/fighter aircraft around has a couple of
disadvantages... for one... the airframe is inherently unstable...
requiring more than the usual aileron/rear control surface package to
handle the plane... a pilot will go crazy trying to control those
surfaces manually... this plane is a virtual brick without a computer
running it.



Anyway, that's the closest we'll all be to having F16s here in the
Philippines... the current state of government finances has ruined our
armed forces... particularly our airforce into a pathetic transport
cor... In fact, most of the pilots/troops... if they haven't already
left for the civil aviation sector... are being retrained as ground
forces...



Oh yes... we still have an air force, except that... we wait for the enemy to land... then we kill them on the tarmac...

Online Folio- Part 2

First Household Meeting

Glacial

I.M.Pei once said that the secret to being a great architect... aside
from doing good architecture... is out-living all your peers. 



How true... Architecture will always be an old man's profession. The
fact is, most of the modernist master starchitects around today ( Gehry, Meier... even Thom Mayne...
the self-described rebel of the profession... are way past their 60s)
only started coming up with really good work during their 40s and 50s.



With this in mind... its kind of frustrating for me, because I feel, at
times, that in some ways I've gone through an unnaturally steep
learning curve... thanks of course to my training under my dad, and the
few, key opportunities I've been able to take advantage off.



Of course, its good to get a head start in my line of work... but I'm
afraid of burning out and losing steam... or worse... checking myself
into a heart bypass because of all the stress and pressure on my
shoulders.



Walking around Makati during lunch... I get to see all sorts of people
from my generation... people in their 20s and early 30s... and I can't
help but wonder if they get better breaks and opportunities because
they are in a line of work that rewards youth, energy and fresh ideas-
maybe marketing... or business... IT, etc. Because these fields are
relatively new in the history of civilization, they also move faster...
at the speed of light... of the electrons that display this webpage on
your screen...



Because Architecture has been around since man's first informal
settlements... and since we deal things that are solid... concrete from
the earth, metal and steel from ore, glass from sand/silica... all of
which took millions of years to form... its no wonder why careers in
architecture move at a glacial pace...



Software versions are measured in years, even months... interior
renovations on a per turnover basis... buildings in years and
decades... city and suburban plans in lifetimes and generations.



I feel impatient, because I know I can take things on... and that even
if it would be something new, I can hit the ground running... 



But who am I kidding... I'm only 22... a whole lifetime ahead of me...
a whole bunch of things to  learn...  I just have to let God
mold and temper me... hopefully in the future... I move from
being stuck in the bridge of the knife... onto the cutting edge.



Time is on my side.

The San Francisco 49ers Webzone

http://www.49erswebzone.com

Gawad Kalinga GK777

http://www.gawadkalinga.org/

Architecture for Humanity

http://www.architectureforhumanity.org/

The Rural Studio - in memory of Sambo Mockbee

http://www.ruralstudio.com

Lifehacker.com -> the definitive guide to life, tech, etc.

http://www.lifehacker.com

Sketch-Up Website -> prime design visualization tool

http://www.sketchup.com

Pushpullbar.com -> Architecture and Design forum... Sketch-Up resources...

http://www.pushpullbar.com/index.php

Metropolis Magazine

http://metropolismag.com/cda/

The Gutter- a portal for... pointed architectural discourse and debate... to say it nicely

http://gutter.curbed.com/

Online Folio - part1

Things will be different

What
induced my most recent angst-filled tirade? Well, its simple… our firm lost 2
major commissions to guys whom we fought tooth and nail against. The worst
thing to stomach is to see a proud man (my dad) humbled, and to grin and bear
it quietly. How I wish I had my dad’s age and experience… maybe I wouldn’t be
as pissed as I am.

 

Its
frustrating because I know deep in my heart that we would have done a better
job than the 2 firms who won the commissions because we bring our hearts into
the job, our loyalties are to the project… not to our egos, nor to the public,
not even the owners… not even our pockets, but to the welfare of the project.

 

The
other day, I was browsing through the department’s library looking at the
shelves full of consultant profiles… I was surprised to see my dad’s company
profile in one of the shelves (yes… we sent one to ALI back when I just won the
competition… as a longshot move to prequalify for any work).

 

The
profile was filed away with the other rejects… full of local veterans, without
much foreign experience. Its painful for a son to see his idol get shelved and
shrugged off. But I guess, that’s why I’m here… Its my turn now, its my fight
now. Things will be different.

One heck of a catch!

Angst, oh sweet artistic angst!

Disclaimer... the following post is brought to you by a sudden bout of angsty-lonely artist/architect depression



Much as I would want to post about what happened during my short visit
to Sydney... I won't... because... first of all... I might end up
repeating myself during conversations... also... who cares?! Its not as
if my blog is raking in the hits... so... I'll just keep it to myself...







Life as an architect/designer/artist is really a never ending struggle
to get your vision done. Its a lonely struggle... a test of
character... of discipline and of internal strength. How I envy
artists/writers... who get to practice their art without having to rely
on anyone to implement it for them.



For every Frank Gehry- Rem Koolhaas - Tadao Ando- Daniel Libeskind
starchitect, there are about 15,000 sweatshop
draftsmen/cadsmen/renderers/frustrated academecians/production people
whom the world will never know about, who will never be able to make
their marks on this earth.



Either they didn't have the talent... the connections/clients... the
knees to make decisions on their own... the stomach to brownose their
way to commissions... the fire to desire something better... the
imagination and forebearance to imagineer their ideas... the solubility
to compromise... 



Knowing this... I know what I have to be. I know what I have to do.



And despite times like these... when I rant and complain... I know what
my purpose is. I know what God put me here for. And as arrogant as it
sounds... I cannot be broken anymore.

Best of You by the Foo Fighters

I’ve got another confession to make

I’m your fool

Everyone’s got their chains to break

Holdin’ you

Were you born to resist or be abused?

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Are you gone and onto someone new?

I needed somewhere to hang my head

Without your noose

You gave me something that I didn’t have

But had no use

I was too weak to give in

Too strong to lose

My heart is under arrest again

But I break loose

My head is giving me life or death

But I can’t choose

I swear I’ll never give in

I refuse

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Has someone taken your faith?

Its real, the pain you feel

You trust, you must

Confess

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Oh...

Oh...Oh...Oh...Oh...

Has someone taken your faith?

Its real, the pain you feel

The life, the love

You die to heal

The hope that starts

The broken hearts

You trust, you must

Confess

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

I’ve got another confession my friend

I’m no fool

I’m getting tired of starting again

Somewhere new

Were you born to resist or be abused?

I swear I’ll never give in

I refuse

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Has someone taken your faith?

Its real, the pain you feel

You trust, you must

Confess

Is someone getting the best, the best, the best, the best of you?

Oh...

Back to the grind... full updates to follow

10 years ago I...

> Was an impulsive hormonal wreck

> was a frustrated computer geek

> a constipated band geek



5 years ago I...

> was a freshman at UST... THE Royal and Pontifical UST... hahaha

> was a culture-shocked noob!

> questioned my decision to go to UST instead of UP Diliman Archi...



1 year ago I...

> Was pounding away on the keyboard... finishing my thesis book...

> And doing schematic site plans

> while enjoying the company of my college bros! and my block!



Yesterday I...

> was on PR 210, on my way home from Sydney...

> rediscovered the miracle of flight...

> thanked God for blessing me and my family



5 snacks I enjoy...

> Jamaican Patties

> Dimsum/Siopao

> Shingaling

> Dried Mangoes!

> Yakisoba... throwback to my college days...



5 songs I know all the words to...

> Bigger than my body by John Mayer

> Miracle Drug by U2

> Sugat by Dictalicense

> Noypi by Bamboo

> Liwanag sa Dilim by Rivermaya

at marami pang iba...



5 things I would do with 100 million dollars...

> Go full time with Gawad Kalinga...

> Go on mission for SFC... to China... or to Afghanistan... serve God and see the world at the same time

> Buy into Ayala Land or SM Prime... =) hehehe... hostile take over
ba... tapos go into building mass transit rail systems for manila and
the suburbs

> Buy a cessna, learn to fly

> Transform my Dad's firm into a design studio-ala Rural
Studio/Taliesin West... teach designers and architects what they don't
teach in school, build cool designer houses for GK... and win the
pritzker/nobel in the same year... yeah right... dream on...



5 places I would run away to...

> San Francisco

> back to Sydney!

> Christchurch

> Paris

> Lingayen



5 places I would love to go to..

> Amanpulo

> Bilbao- see the Guggenheim

> the Himalayas

> St. Peter's Basilica

> Xiamen- figure out where my ancestors came from...



5 things I would never wear...

> basta... anything that's too tight

> too loose

> too feminine

> anything that's uncomfortable

> but then... architects are supposed to be artists... so we ought to be able to get away with anything =)



5 favorite TV shows...

> CSI... NY, LV, Miami

> Design 360 on CNN

> Dreamspaces on BBC

> Megacities on NatGeo

> The Apprentice



5 bad habits...

> Food binges... especially when stressed/depressed

> Kaangasan/kayabangan

> Being a critic

> Impatience

> Procrastinating... putting things off until the last minute... especially when I know what I can and can't do...



5 biggest joys...

> God

> Family and good friends

> The joy of being able to do what you love...

> Learning something new

> Traveling/Seeing the world



5 fictional characters I would date...

> Dominique Francon from The Fountainhead

> Dagny Taggart from Atlas Shrugged

> *

> *

> *



Books on my bedside table...


> The Bible

> Red Storm Rising... last remaining Clancy book that I haven't read... almost done

> State of Fear... the new one by Crichton

> Timeline... also by Crichton, haven't seen the movie yet


> The Tailor of Panama by John LeCarre


> Purpose Driven Life... rereading it... almost done

> The Fountainhead... rereading it din... before I give it away again...

> The Pecking Order ... almost done

> Freakonomics ... almost done

> The McKinsey Way ... management consulting's bigshots... almost done

> Content by Rem Koolhaas

> The Foucault Pendulum by Umberto Eco

> The Early Ayn Rand

> Anthem by Ayn Rand



5 Songs I've been listening a lot to lately...

> Gold Digger by Kanye West and Jamie Foxx

> Alright by John Legend

> Stars by Switchfoot

> Make your move by Incubus

> Ang Ating Araw by Dictalicense